The Red System
The” Red System” as I learnt in pain clinic. Is there to protect you from a threat. It’s your flight or fright response, In my case my flight and fright response is working in overdrive. It is linked to fear, worry, anger and stress. I feel like my whole body is shutting down. My thoughts turn negative and i cannot function.
When I’m in the red system in pain. I feel an array of emotions. Mostly negative feelings such as anger, worry and sadness. I often get angry with myself and my mood is very low. I cannot think straight and I just ask myself… “Why me?” I will withdrawal away from socializing. The pain I am feeling is so overwhelming. When my pain volume is up. My brain can amplify the pain and send signals to my nerves. It’s like my body has hit a brick wall…
When I’m in a flare up the effects can be felt all over my body. Starting with my head. It feels as though someone has my head in a vice. The person in charge of the lever is slowly turning up the pressure. My eye sockets, check bones and jaw are all consumed with pressure. My hair is tied up. I need to take the band out. The pain is unbearable and I cannot talk properly. I move onto my shoulders. Is someone sat on them? They feel so heavy, so tense and I cannot lift my arms above my head. My neck is tight. I can feel every tendon, every muscle contracting. My neck will not move from side to side. I can hear ringing in my ears. It’s so loud and I cannot turn the volume down.
My wrists hurt. I cannot write, text, type. I just can’t grasp an object with my hands. There are pins and needles in my fingertips. I have no sensation and I cannot feel.
The left side of back goes into spasm. Is someone punching me in the side? My body goes ridged because of the pain. This then effects the lower part of my back. There is this dull ache I cannot shift. My legs become concrete. I cannot move them. Each foot step feels like I’m walking through straw and pins.
My toes touch the floor. Each toe step sends an electric shock to my head. I don’t know what to with myself. My own body is attacking me. All I can do is to take my mediation to ease the pain. My emotions are all over the place. I just want to be on my own. I don’t see a way out. I cannot sleep the pain is keeping me awake. My body is in a state of alert. It will try to protect itself. My heartbeat races and my breathing becomes more rapid. This then causes my muscle to tense. I can go into a panic attack at this point.
When a flare up like this happens. Explaining it to someone is very difficult. The red system is a defense mechanism. With me however it is working a little to well and every sensation, feeling is turned up to cause pain.
How does the Red System affect you…?