My Fibromyalgia.

I state the title “My Fibromyalgia” because each person is not the same. We all have our unique symptoms.

Two years ago I started to get tired quickly. I just wanted to keep sleeping. This tired feeling felt different. It felt as though I was awake dreaming. I started to pick up bugs easily. My immune system was constantly fighting. It felt as though I was forever battling with my own body. Numerous visits to the doctors. Was I time wasting? I knew something wasn’t right. More symptoms started arising. My ears were hurting and I could hear ringing. My sight was blurring. My face and throat felt as though it was tightening. My neck and shoulders were tensing. I started spasming. My arms and legs felt so heavy. My hands and feet were burning. I cannot get out of bed when I am like this. Am I becoming an old lady? What on Earth was happening?

It’s not over. A muscle in the back of my neck starts spasming. It touches a nerve and it’s nauseating. I cannot keep my medication down and the stark reality hits me. My dignity is going. My suppositories are needed. It’s the only way I can stop hurting. The neuropathic pain is agony.

These are just some of the Physical signs I experience with Fibromyalgia. Everyday, I am in some sort of pain. Some days you cant see. Those of you who know me. My face says it. Other days my mask hides it. Behind the mask and behind the humor I still feel it. Another voice it seems inside of me wanting to speak. Its telling me “Your Hurting” and “Something needs doing” There is nothing I can do. No one wants to listen to me. “She is exhausting, so negative and annoying” I wonder to myself sometimes.

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